Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Wedding Rings

I broke my wedding ring.

A few months ago, I was opening our basement door and caught my wedding ring on the handle and I instinctively pulled back. A freak accident I would never be able to repeat, but it pulled the ring part from the setting, making my ring a U shape.
Recently I went out of town and was able to take it in to be repaired. Apparently, according to the lady who called me Tuesday, it has too extensive of damage and is unrepairable.

I'm sick. I cry when I think about it too much. Danny assures me we will take it to several jewelers just to be sure it really IS not able to be fixed.  Several people have mentioned melting it and having it re-made into something new.  The thought of that makes me super sad, but I guess it would still ,in a round about way, be my ring. And I have looked at other sets, which most girls would probably find exciting. I just felt sad and a bit like I was cheating on my ring. And I think it would feel strange to have a "fake" ring..a ring that had NO meaning or history on that finger. I could possible to over-thinking this entire thing too. ;)

I love my rings.  They are nothing fancy, with their little itty bitty diamonds, but they tell so many stories.  They were put on me when I put on that ridiculously huge white dress on that hot August day, and made the best decision I have ever made in my life. They tell of a time when ramen noodles were considered a feast,  and we sat with paychecks in hand and  tried to determine which bill was the most important bill we should pay--only having enough money to pay one.  They were slipped into the pocket of my husbands jeans while he waited on news from the operating room where I, and soon to be born, Jacob, had disappeared behind.  And  they were on my hand that held Danny's as our Tristen came into the world.  They have been with me as I stayed up all night long with sick babies.  My ring held the hand of my dying Grandmother, and sat on my worried hands while waiting on news from  my dad to come out of countless surgeries, while I thoughtlessly twirled them around and around on my finger.


The day after my Grandmother died, Mom and I were sitting at the table, digging through her jewelry box, trying to find the perfect jewelry for her to be buried in, when I found an old beat up tarnished gold band. Inside there was an inscription, so worn down you could barely read it, but it had the names of my grandparents inside with a date.  The beautiful fancy gold band she wore on her finger everyday was not her original wedding ring. It was like finding a buried treasure and my mom made sure my Grandmother was buried with both of her rings.

I've thought about that ring a lot the last couple of days. Did my grandfather surprise her with a new ring?   Did she WANT a new ring?  Would my grandchildren find my U shaped ring someday and wonder what the heck happened?  Will everyone know how much I loved that ring?

I'm still holding on to hope that my rings will be fixed and THINKING a bit about what I will do if they can't be. The fact that I have a 3 year old frame of mind right now, and don't want ANY other ring on my finger EXCEPT MY ring really isn't helping much.

And if I DO get a new ring, I think I'll probably need to get something made out of the same metal they make shot guns out of. Surely I wouldn't be able to destroy THAT.

Ladies.. I'm here to tell you--Love your wedding rings. Take them off, clean up them, and let them shine on your finger!  Its heartbreaking and sad when they are not there anymore!


Gardener on Sherlock Street said...

I feel your anguish. One day, I looked down and discovered a very important prong on my ring was broke. When the jeweler looked at it, I was also told I had chipped the diamond (aren't diamonds suppose to be so hard they chip other things). Anyway, they took apart the bands, rebuilt the head that held the diamond and reinscribed our wedding date and my hubby's name (although they put it on the engagement band which is wrong--if it needs fixed again I will be specific about where that goes.) Jewelry stores advertise designers making whatever you want out of "old" jewelry all the time-- just bring in an idea or drawing. Do you have photos of your rings from your wedding? Somewhere, there is a jewelry store that can help you rebuild your ring with your ring. You may need a to add some gold. It probably bent because it had worn down a bit. GOOD LUCK!
BTW--My mom has her 'old' bands and my dad's 'old' band in her jewelry box because they wore the gold down so much they had to get new ones. A jeweler copied the old setting to make the new one transferring the diamond.

Melanie said...

I think your possibilities are ENDLESS. .I know you are heartbroken about the original. .but I'll bet you can be very creative with it if you need to be. .So sorry it can't be fixed!!

Rhonda said...

Wow, I am sure sorry about that. I hope they can SOMEHOW be fixed. Thanks for sharing all your memories, I loved the one about your grandma's ring with the inscription.