"Do you live in tomorrow when you must face today? At times, I forget to live in the moment, but what do I miss? The setting sun, the sound of birds' singing and, most importantly, I miss meeting myself. I am constantly changing, and if I don't spend time with myself in the here and now, I will never get to appreciate who I truly am because I am too busy focusing on who I want to be."
For the past year or so, I had tried to resume walking off and on.. I love walking. Walking makes me feel incredible. It gives me energy, time alone to think or rock out to my MP3 player. However, I haven't been able to do this because about half way though my calves would lock up with horrible cramps. These things would wrap around to the front of my legs and even make my bones hurt later. Several times it has gotten so bad I've had to call D to come and pick me up half way though the walk. I had tried everything to making sure I was hydrated to buying new shoes and stretching out before hand, and pretty much just given up. I talked to my very favorite nurse practitioner, and the local pharmacist, and they both told me that I was lacking either calcium, magnesium, or potassium. The pharmacist grabbed 2 bottles off the shelf, chucked them at me, and sent me on my way. Whatever, I thought. I didn't think anything was ever going to help. Started taking the meds, gave it 2 weeks before walking again. T had been on my case to walk, becuase he's been going with me and riding his bike. He loves to ride ahead and then loop back around me over and over again, chit chatting about nothing. So I take off, with a pit in my stomach, waiting for the cramps to start any moment. Get to the point they usually start bothering me. So far so good. Past the point where D has had to come pick me up. "Wow, Mom, your walking FAST today!" Holy cow. This might be working!! Get over by the hospital and all I feel is the delicious burning in my calves that's tells me my legs have missed the walking too. Almost home and I'm grinning, listening to T's endless chatter and the birds chirping, loving my life. I felt amazing. I felt incredible! I felt like ME! I haven't felt like ME for a long time!
I missed me. I hope she sticks around.